i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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