I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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