He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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