He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
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