Kiss
Puke
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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