what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize