Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
