Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
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