Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
