there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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