yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize