Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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