This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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