ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize