i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
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