I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize