I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
