Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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