you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
