Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
