can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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