Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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