What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize