Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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