You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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