got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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