Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize