Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
