I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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