YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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