He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
