I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
