your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
