I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
