If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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