The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
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