I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Randomize
