didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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