Buhtt sex?
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
