I love having hate sex.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
