just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
