it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
soo... how was my night?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
