i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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