But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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