I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
