Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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