i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I'm bleeding and have questions
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
