Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
