Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
