we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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