walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
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