The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
