Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
